How Avengers age of Ultron should have happened…

aou

How Avengers age of Ultron should have happened...

The Earths mightiest Zeroes!!

First off- it’s called “Age of Ultron”- and the “man” (droid/Ai or whatever) in question was technically only “alive” or in existence for like, I don’t know, a week max? That is feeble beyond belief. If I was to make Age of Ultron the first thing I would have done is at least give Ultron an actual reign for enough time to make it a legitimate call for the film to be called Age of Ultron.

Okay If I was to create the story points for AOU I probably would start and end completely differently but I will be using the existing plots as a jumping off point to pretty much slam the film for the hell of it!

The film begins with the heros doing their “thang” (Sorry I dont know where that came from- but it stays). They Jump and have a bit of banter whilst they either do or don’t watch their language which is nice its Cap being who he is and it causes some “hehe’s” to get the movie going. They simply take down the existing Hydra cell in an eastern European style country. Again some fun and action the whole time.

We are introduced to “enhanced human” twins, who we all know should be mutants and the offspring of the baddest mutant of them all- but the less said about their backstory the better because we don’t want to get muddled into the ownership of rights for cinematic releases. But the maximoff twins are introduced- one is fast the other is weird- fair enough! I will say it here before I go on- you messed up Marvel- you shoulda waited to introduce “muties” or said nothing and used this as your key to bring together an uncanny film where we see the crossover epic everyone really wants to see and just call it Avengers Vs Xmen!

You missed that boat, and therefore House of M especially that you seemed to down play or eradicate Scarlet Witches’ actual powers. Sad, just sad…

The Avengers after being successful on another mission relax after they put away their toys, well, Ironmans toys- the Machine Police or whatever. And no one has batted an eye lid at this point- so its okay for a ragtag team to use puppet machines as members of the Avengers. This should have been the moment when the world sees the greatness of Stark industries and praised for creating Machines that could benefit mankind and bring in a new era of peace etc etc then they go partying being officially dubbed the world’s mightiest heroes.

The party was fun, we see Stan Lee out of his head on Asgardian booze (wouldnt mind a shot of that stuff) even though it probably should have killed him. Love interests between Banner and Black Widow are surfacing and the awesome scene with the lifting of Thor’s Hammer, Mjölnir. I loved that when I saw the trailer especially the part with Captain America almost moving it (He is so totally worthy- but I love the big boy scout). One thing that annoyed me about this scene, if I remember correctly. When I say the trailer cut of this there was music which made it fun but in the movie there wasn’t and it seemed flat. I hate when trailers are better than the film (more of that to come soon!)

We also see the amazing introduction of Ultron, sorry did I say amazing? I meant mediocre. Yeah It was nice to see him walk out all riddled and broke, but before I go on- What the fuck? So out of nowhere Ultron is “alive”. There was like one scene montage with Banner and Stark trying to build Ultron out of the code from Lokis staff- What really? Does this really have to be a part of the movie? Seems very thin (but could be reason- keep reading). At some point a mention to his fathers work or work with the program “Pym Industries” began would have been nice in honour of the actual creator in the comics. But Noooo! Stark does it all. I even thought we would have him use code that was left over from the shield days which was excavated from Arnim Zola the human computer from Capt America Winter Solder. But Noooo!! Stark does it and there happened to be evil code mixed in with the brain code from within a staff of Lokis. Why not just create AI code which obviously didnt work- even out of Jarvis which was corrupted- simples!

But the introduction of Ultron- Oops no one noticed we created evil AI and it has taken over all the Machine Police from earlier. Eh I can get over most of that really- except for I was waiting for “There ain’t no strings on me” delivered from the trailer here with as much umpf… but alas- there wasn’t umpf or not even sure the line was delivered. Then on to Ultron building a new body because the broken doll didn’t work to well- not much of an evil AI eh? So he creates a body- just designs it the way it is- why not lets hurry along with the plot anyways.

This seems to be the Ultimate flaw of this and a lot other films recently- rush rush rush whats going on. Here is where I may have taken it away from what the actual plotline was. We should have the Machine Police being shipped into every City in America and the world if you’re into that sort of thing, maybe even before the birth of Ultron. The Machines do their Job well and are loved for Months and Avengers are loved too. We see the Machines going too far eg breaking a kids arm for spray painting on a wall. Ultrons Peace Keeping Protocol is becoming contradictory. It begins to corrupt. One of the Machines has to Kill to Protect human life- Ultimate contradiction. Months down the line we see everything ramp up. The Humans fighting back and calling out the Avengers who could be retired or disbanded because the Machine Police are on it. Stark Goes to turn off the Ultron Program… and it says… NO. Boom- And Ultron is born, and escapes into the internet- and who wouldn’t (/doesn’t).

Why does Ultron need the twins? And Why does he end up in Wakanda for Vibranium? Oh thats right they don’t own the rights to use Adamantium and obviously need a few wee easter eggs for further films. Which is another massive flaw of the movie- it tries to set up all the other films coming. We could have just gotten Thor getting the visions of Ragnarock without being mind controlled by Scarlet Witch and Stark seeing the Avengers die because we could have Ultron go to his “creator” and say that he will destroy him and his friends because he has finally worked out how to protect humanity- from itself. Avengers go into hiding. And this is where we have it- months of Ultron being born, and then a few months of him taking over all machines all the Machine Ultron Police and going round killing people in positions of power etc.

Avengers are shamed and everyone in world in danger. Villain set up. And a Villain with no cool- I never have read a comic or seen an evil robot being so fun- which didn’t pay off really. But with the threat of “My Ultron” it was reason for the Avengers to have to use old spy methods under the guidance of Capt who fought a war without the use of Computers etc to round up the heroes again (and here is where we could have introduced a wider selection of heroes) to start the fight against Ultron. The one thing they need- is someone who could actually beat him. What they need is one of the machines itself and to allocate new code and to build up a new machine body that could match Ultron… And there we have it… Vision. Who to me should be childlike and being to learn at a super advanced rate until he finally meets his maker at the end. We could have the ultimate standoff. Similar to what happened but more focused on Ultron vs Vision with everyone else helping in some way. But I did like the handing of Thor’s hammer when the rest of the team don’t trust him.

That is essentially it- bar a few things. Hulk in space?- they better do planet hulk or something! Loved the Hulkbuster scene- just loads of fun!! And wanted to see more of the relationship between hulk and Black Widow just for the intrigue of “Is she pregnant”? I wanted Cap and Ironman to be completely on the opposite ends of the spectrum by the end with a lot of trust issues. And I would not have killed Quicksilver- fact- why would you… unless… ah yeah movie rights again! And i loved hawkeye- he was the heart of the film which is where it lacked and he was the only saving grace. And there was a nice touch at the end with his kid being called “Nathaniel Pedro Barton” a tear nearly came to my eye. Hawkeye to sentimental son of a…Well, all that being said- the movie was popcorn eating fun with flashing lights action and everything else- but it just lacked depth for me. I wish I could have written it because this could be the end of the line for the MCU, they may have reached their peak and it may be time for… the Age of DC.

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